Raising small(er) than average kids

So most people I know who have children have something about their child that sets them apart from others - after all, as humans we're all different, right? with us, our kids tend to be small - and by small, I mean waaaay smaller than average - think words like 'petite', and 'runt' and that will give you a nice mental image.

I guess it's something that's been on my mind a lot on and off over the past 3 1/2 years. Probably because to start with, it's the only observation you can make about a baby. I mean, it's what everyone wants to know when they're born, right? how much did they weigh at birth. Afterwards, weight gain is used as a way to gauge how well a baby is doing (or not doing) and it is diligently charted at every checkup from that point. It's used when you want to brag about how well your baby is doing - 'X put on 400 grams last week!' etc etc.

Tim and I seem to produce babies that gain weight super slowly. They start off small and remain small regardless of how much they're fed. Where other babies might make gains of up to 500 grams per week, the biggest gain either of mine ever did was around the 150 gram mark (Vivi actually gained only 20 grams between age 3-4 months). The remarks from the plunket nurse was always the same 'slow but steady gainer', and would make us feel as though we deserved a gold star if one of our kids made a miraculous leap into another percentile line. Always I felt the pressure to 'feed more' that our babies were too thin, too small. In the early days, whenever I took them out and about - and I found this especially with Henry -I would get unwanted comments about his size with one person actually once refusing to believe me that I had a six month old baby ('because he looks like a two month old'). I must admit, it got tiresome always feeling a need to justify the size of my babies and to have to try to think of some reason for their size that would shut the commenters up. Worse still would be those who would hold their huge babies up next to mine and delight in proclaiming how big their kid was compared to mine. I couldn't help but feel that I'd failed as a mother somehow, in not producing a 'bonny baby' with fat rolls and chubby cheeks.

I know that it's just genetics and that you can't do anything about it, but it's still irritating at times. Luckily however, Henry has started to display some absolutely lovely toddler behaviours such as biting and hair pulling that quickly distract people from focusing on how small he is (and who knows, maybe the fact that he looks small and cute is working to his advantage as no one sees his attacks coming!).